Naught

Complexity
Hidden within subtlety
A turn of events
In turn may reveal, temporal enlightenment
Which also conceals, immoral abandonment
Certain knowledge locked away
Hidden in the minds decay
This subtlety, mysteriously
Surfaces, spontaneously
And somehow it engrosses me
Induces me, this way to be, (duality)
As I stray, the passing day
And long, black night, shall make this right
The truth I hold, shall not be told
For I alone, know the unknown
I stand on my own
Out from within, the story begins
Eternal contention, internal suppression
Conscious insecurity, spiritual impurity
This world it seems, is not yet ready for me

Inside this tangled web I’m caught
And I find that it is all for naught

With my soul on trial, (Inside of my silent snare)
My mind in denial, (I remain so unaware)
Emotions defiled, (Choking on the poison air)
My ways, they are vile, (Pretending that I sometimes care)
I choke on the bile, (Step into my little lair)
The things I’ve done while, (Say yourself a little prayer)
Traversing these miles, (Prepare to have a little scare)
Cannot reconcile, (Recognize this sullen glare?)
My own mind’s beguile, (You, my friend, should be aware)
My own tongue’s revile, (These things will lead you to despair)
A means of decrial, (All upon this time is bare)
And I will meanwhile, (Step into my minds nightmare)
Continue to rile, (You’ll see throughout this whole affair)
Myself I enisle, (My very soul begins to tear)
These acts are what I’ll, (Soon your mind I will impair)
Use in my exile, (As I will show you all my wares)
This all in my style
Can’t you see my evil smile?

These the things my mind has wrought
Yet in my mind it still is naught

Lost
All is lost
May we now then count the cost? Sacrifice me on your cross?
Upon my neck your albatross? In my mind I count the loss
In the sky, upon the land
In the oceans, to the sands
Further I will, travel and
Find a way, on this day
Your laws I will, disobey
Destiny will not delay
On I walk, my key unlock
Secret desires, mysterious fires
My awareness prior
To your dogma, and your canon
In these walls, by far unfathomed
Esoteric lost wisdom, fallen out of the continuum
Not learning, just burning
In anger, in fear
In strangeness, I disappear

Remembering that I have forgot
Remember that it is for naught

Consecration by abjection, consternation in dejection
Aggravation and aggression, desperation, misdirection
Desecration of perfection, augmentation of depression
Desolation, introspection, lamentation with reflection
Protestation of possession, decimation and rejection
Segregation for repression, cultivation for dissection
Vindication of concession, degradation, imperfection
Limitation of protection, variation of succession
Depravation with digression, allegation of transgression
Devastation my obsession, mutilation recollection
Domination then oppression, estimation and selection
Flagellation or injection, declaration and confession
Hesitation for correction, separation, dispossession
Deprecation and infection, condemnation of discretion
Violation of expression, congregation of regression
Inspiration with subjection, defamation of affection
Deprivation of connection, destination, retrogression

Then from these I live distraught
Grim and broken-all for naught

All the teachers, and their lies
Inaccurately, edify
And the pupils, mindless fools
Have learned their roles, as mindless tools
We build the machine, submit our control
Then crown it as king, crawl back to our holes
Seeking answers, questionless
A victory, without a loss
Those answers lie rotting, and spiritless
They cannot be revealed, though they are not lost
The seekers and saviors, and harlots and kings
Our gods and our demons, and birds on the wing
From ocean to ocean, between everything
Can we learn from them, learn one single thing
Turn with the tide, and fly with the wind
Come out from below, but never begin
To open our eyes, and thus never end

If only to destroy my thought
I must believe it is for naught

I’ve fallen now through the final crack
Upon the world, upon you all
Now once and forever I turn my back
I look to the sky, and the look in my eye
Reflects my lost time, my life’s history
The meaning of this, of what I may be
I am filled with emptiness, emptied of life force
And filled then with pain
I look to the land, the thoughts through my mind
Show me the holes, that never were filled
The meaning of this, I long ago killed
I am full of nothingness, nothing in my life
Can ever stop the rain
I look to the sea, the waves in my head
Rocks back in a sway, that never let’s go
The meaning of this, I lost long ago
I take it all out of my mind, my mind will always understand
Because I have gone insane

And in conception-misbegot
I knew at once, it was for naught

Blackened skies, hang overhead
On moonless nights, I proceed on so misled
Through the fog, to where I go
Though where this may be, still I do not know
Lightning arcs across the sky
Briefly shows the way to me
Thunder echoes in my mind
The dark returns and I cannot see
Perception of all in time and space
This knowledge lacking in it’s right
Ignorance and wisdom are the same
They do not show me through the night
So hide me away, away from the night
Night of my loss, loss of my light
Light now the way, way to become
Become what I may, may I never be done
Done with the truth, truth turns to lie
To lie in the mud, the mud fills my soul
My soul I see can no longer grow

And in this burning tomb I’ll rot
Because it has been all for naught

Though may we avail, assuredly no
The cries and the wails, assuredly so
Inside of the vale, regression shall grow
What does it entail, I do not know
Are we doomed to fail, submit to our foe
The cure of our ails, quite certainly no
And if we set sail, the wind will not blow
Upon land the gale, will flatten us though
The search for the grail, is what we follow
May we countervail, the evil we sow
Still upon the trail, and where shall we go
The cliffs we may scale, will leave us below
Our lives are so frail, but we do not know
A new shade of pale, and new depth of low
In every detail, we see tomorrow
At last you inhale, and to you I show
This failed fairy tail, will leave us in throe

Losing all that I have sought
I see it has been all for naught

Sensations, negations
Without cause, without fail
Shortest straws, cannot avail
Causation, ideation
All is lost in this translation
Affirming my thoughts, process of my mind
Degrading my past, leave myself behind
My thought becomes numb, my eyes, though, they shine
Though my soul flies free, my body confines
Intensive, destructive
Pursued by, hounds of Hell
Tried to deny, still, I fell
Deceptive, indistinctive
Torn to pieces in this narrative
Withholding my doubts, I’m wasting my time
I set to offend, prepare for my crime
I’ve tried many ways, to show my requite
Though now I will go, to my blackest night